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What 8 Years of Health Coaching Has Taught Me About Clients Who Actually Succeed
After 8 years of personal training and online coaching, I’ve worked with over 100 clients across every season of life: fat loss, improving their relationship with food, postpartum recovery, perimenopause and menopause, training for a triathlon, a backpacking trip in Nepal, and everything in between.
Different health goals. Different bodies. Different life circumstances.
Here are the 5 traits I see over and over again in my most successful clients:
1. They commit to consistency, and keep the goal posts wide.
My most successful clients aren’t the ones who go “all in” for three months. Instead, they show up imperfectly, but repeatedly, even if they can only give 30% that week.
“All-or-nothing” mindset is a pattern of thinking that can be broken.
Clients learn to understand that:
- Missed workouts don’t mean starting over
- One “off-plan” meal doesn’t mean self-sabotage the whole day
- A hard week of life doesn’t mean you make zero progress
We learn to zoom out. Play the long game. And that consistency compounds.
2. They are willing to be challenged with discomfort (not in extremes)
Successful clients are willing to:
- Sit with hunger cues instead of reacting instantly (“hunger is not an emergency”)
- Challenge old food rules and fear foods (who is your food police anyways?)
- Allow their body to change slowly, and not impose self-prescribed urgency / timelines
- Stick to the plan, even when it’s boring and results aren’t immediate
We lean into productive discomfort and trust the process.
3. They focus on behaviors before outcomes
The clients who struggle the very most are outcome-focused.
The scale, the mirror, clothes fitting, their timeline, takes up more mental real estate than anything they’re actually doing.
My best clients learn to ask different questions to themselves:
- Not “Did the scale go down today?” but “Did I hit my protein today?”
- Not “Do I fit into my old jeans yet?” but “Did I get my steps in?”
- Not “Did I cheat on my diet?” but “Did I eat slowly and mindfully?”
- Not “Do I see more toning in the mirror yet?” but “Did I lift consistently this week?”
We understand that behaviors drive results, not the other way around.
4. They take responsibility without shame
This is a big one. Maybe you’ve heard this described as a “growth mindset”.
Successful clients don’t make excuses, but they also don’t beat themselves up.
They say things like:
- “This week was chaotic, here’s what I can control.”
- “That didn’t work, let’s adjust and try something else.”
- “I didn’t show up how I wanted, but I’m not a failure.”
I always tell clients: You get unlimited do-overs. Failure is only feedback.
Self-criticism and self-deprication is not being pragmatic and disciplined.
Ownership and self-compassion are actually the more powerful combination.
5. They trust the process more than their emotions
Motivation fluctuates. Confidence fluctuates. Energy, the scale, everything fluctuates.
The most successful clients don’t allow for emotional whiplash when the fluctuations are happening. They follow the plan even when:
- Compliance shifts due to life constraints
- The scale stalls
- They have body image woes
- Old doubts occasionally creep back in
They borrow belief—from their coach (me, hi), from the procedures we’ve set in place, from past evidence of their own success—until their own belief in themselves catches back up.
If you’re reading this and thinking, “I want to be this kind of client,” that is a strong starting point. We call this the pre-contemplation or contemplation stage, and it’s the first step towards total lifestyle change.
So if that’s you, take note:
You don’t need to overhaul everything at once.
You don’t need more discipline, time, _____.
You don’t need to show up perfect.
One decision at a time.
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